


Find What Fits

by gundamthey17



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling, Les Misérables - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe - Fusion, Alternate Universe - Hogwarts, Crossover, I'm Bad At Titles, Les Amis at Hogwarts, M/M, Nonbinary Remus
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-11
Updated: 2020-10-11
Packaged: 2021-03-07 16:53:43
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,466
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26940946
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/gundamthey17/pseuds/gundamthey17
Summary: The exchange students from Beauxbatons have one night left at Hogwarts. Remus has a thought provoking conversation with Jehan.
Relationships: Sirius Black/Remus Lupin
Comments: 2
Kudos: 14
Collections: Trans Wizard Tournament 2020





	Find What Fits

**Author's Note:**

> This is a commission from @lifetoanother on Tumblr for the Trans Wizard Tournament!

The Gryffindor fifth year boys’ dormitory was filled nearly to capacity as thirteen students sat laughing, talking, and drinking butterbeer and contraband firewhiskey. (In fact, it was entirely possible that the room _had_ been filled to capacity, and then had simply expanded to accommodate more people as they entered. Remus was reasonably sure that he had never seen at least one of those chairs before.) It was a Friday night, and the Beauxbatons exchange students would be heading back to France that Sunday. The fifth years were making the most of what little time they had left together, now that winter break was starting and they had no assignments to complete.

Bahorel, James, Sirius, and Peter were playing a drinking game. Remus wasn’t sure who had started it, but he suspected all four of them would be spending some quality time in the bathroom before the night was out. Marius and Cosette were laughing with Dorcas and Marlene; Lily, Enjolras, and Combeferre were engaged in an intense-sounding discussion of Wizard-Muggle relations in France. That left Remus sitting at the edge of the room alone, nursing his firewhiskey, but he was quite content with that arrangement. He was still recovering from the full moon earlier in the week, and he would likely find himself dozing off soon. Suddenly, the room’s final occupant appeared at his side.

“May I sit with you?” Jehan asked. They had been flitting from conversation to conversation for the majority of the night.

“Of course,” Remus replied, moving over to make room on the small couch.

Jehan settled back with a sigh and took a delicate sip from their half full glass of firewhiskey. Their long auburn hair was coming out of its braid, and it spilled over the back of the couch. Their inquisitive hazel eyes roamed the room for a moment before coming to land on Remus’ face. “Hard to believe the semester is over already,” they said, with just a trace of a French accent.

“Yeah,” Remus replied. “It’s been great getting to know you all. We’re going to miss you.”

“Will you write?”

“Sure.”

“All of you,” Jehan clarified. “I am trusting in you to remind the others if they forget.”

Remus smiled. “Lily won’t forget. She’s fascinated by wizard politics. I’ll give the others some gentle reminders now and then. Or not so gentle.”

“Good. Enjolras and Combeferre seem to have met their match in Lily. I honestly did not think it could happen. And everyone else has been wonderful too.” They paused, and seemed to choose their next words carefully. “I wish the rest of our friends could have come as well. They would have liked to meet you.” Remus hummed in response. Jehan continued, “I should put you in touch with our friend Feuilly. You and he have… some things in common.”

“Oh? Is he in your year?”

“Not exactly. There were certain… factors… that prevented him from becoming a student. Our headmaster is perhaps not so accepting as yours.”

Remus turned his head sharply, more curious than offended. His eyes flicked about the room warily, but everyone was intent on their own conversations. “Your friend… you’re saying he’s got a similar… problem? Like mine?”

“I do not want to assume anything about you. But there are certain similarities. I wonder if you two can perhaps encourage one another. He has never encountered anyone whose case is quite the same as his. I could put you in touch with him. If you want, that is.”

“I’d like that.”

“I’m sure Feuilly will appreciate it. And Bahorel too. He and Feuilly are together.”

“That must be hard. I can’t imagine what it would be like for Sirius and me if we – “ Remus cut himself off quickly, realizing what he had said. The fact that he and Sirius were – _whatever_ they were – was not common knowledge. But Jehan merely nodded.

“You would find a way, I am sure. My… what is the word? Significant other? He does not attend Beauxbatons. For reasons mostly of his own choosing, unlike Feuilly.”

Remus couldn’t help but admire the way Jehan spoke about themself and Bahorel having boyfriends. “Is it easier in France?” he asked suddenly.

“Is what easier?”

“Being… you know…” he gestured vaguely.

“Gay?”

Remus let out a startled laugh. “Yes, I guess that’s what I mean. Or – or bisexual, or – any of it.”

Jehan sighed pensively. “Some things, perhaps yes. Others less so. Being entirely yourself will always take courage, no matter the setting.”

“Sirius is always telling me to be myself. But I’m not even sure I know who I am. Or… or what I am.” He wasn’t sure why he was suddenly saying all of these things out loud. Jehan was easy to talk to, and it was entirely possible that the firewhiskey was helping as well.

“That is all right. It takes time. And it’s different for everyone. Sirius may know who he is and be comfortable with that, but you are not him.”

“How did you know that you were…?” Remus trailed off, realizing he actually wasn’t sure how Jehan identified. He finally settled on, “That you wanted to be called they, instead of he or she.”

“Ah,” Jehan nodded. “In some ways, this is easier in English. In French, everything has a gender, he or she. There is very little room for someone who is a different gender, or many genders, or no gender.” Remus listened attentively. Jehan gave a knowing smile. “But this is not what you asked.”

“No, I guess it’s not.”

“How did I know that I am _non binaire_? Well, how is it that I know anything else? Let us look at you, for example. Would you say that you are gay?”

“I’m – I’m bisexual, actually.”

“And how do you know this?”

Remus paused, a furrow appearing between his brows as he considered the question. “I knew I liked Sirius,” he said slowly, “so I thought at first that I was gay. But that… I don’t know, it didn’t seem quite right. I think that I like some girls as well. Or I could. Bisexual seemed to fit better.”

Jehan’s face lit up. “Yes, this is it exactly! Gender is the same. You try something for a while, and maybe it does not fit. Then you try another thing. It is okay to keep trying until you find what fits.”

Remus took a long sip of his drink and nodded.

Jehan laid a hand on his shoulder. “I can see I have given you much to think about, my friend. I will go and make sure the others are not drinking themselves to death. Thank you for your questions. It is nice to be able to speak openly about such things.”

“Thank you for your answers,” Remus replied earnestly.

  
It was well past midnight by the time the last of the guests left the dormitory. Peter and James were both snoring loudly on James’s bed. Remus had taken a seat by the window and was watching the stars. Sirius came up and nudged him from behind.

“You coming to bed?”

“Hm?” Remus said, startled out of his reverie. “Oh. Yes, I’m coming.”

“I know that look.” Sirius took a seat across from him, the expression on his face not quite a grin, but carrying a playful air. “What are you thinking about?”

“Something Jehan said.” They were both silent as Remus considered whether or not to elaborate. His eyes drifted from Sirius’s face back out the window. “Would you still like me if I wasn’t…”

“Wasn’t what?”

“Wasn’t a boy,” Remus finished softly. “I’m not saying that I’m not! Or that I’m a girl. I’m just not sure… that I’m either.”

Sirius took Remus’s hands in his own. “Rem. I like you for who you are. How you identify isn’t going to change that. And it’s okay if you don’t know yet. We can find out together. Keep trying different things until something sticks.”

Remus ducked his head and smiled. “That sounds like what Jehan said.”

“Then you have it on good authority that I know what I’m talking about.”

“That, or you were eavesdropping on me earlier.”

Sirius clasped a hand to his chest in mock offense. “I would never! You impugn my honor, good sir!”

Remus grinned. “I didn’t realize you had any to begin with.”

“How dare you! I demand you cease this chatter at once!” Sirius rose and, in one fluid motion, swept Remus out of his seat and carried him across the room, depositing him onto his bed. Remus tried and failed to suppress his laughter, but James and Peter were sound asleep and did not stir.

Sirius leaned down and pressed a kiss to Remus’s temple. “Good night, Remus Lupin.”

“Good night, Sirius Black.”


End file.
